Knock KnockWho's there !Anderson !Anderson who ?Anderson and daughter came too !

Ralph was driving home one evening and realized that it was his daughter's birthday and he hadn't bought her a present. He drove to the mall and ran to the toy store and he asked the store manager, "How much is that new Barbie in the window?" The Manager replied, "Which one? We have Barbie goes to the gym for $19.95, Barbie goes to the Ball for $19.95, Barbie goes shopping for $19.95, Barbie goes to the beach for $19.95, Barbie goes to the Nightclub for $19.95, and Divorced Barbie for $375.00." "Why is the Divorced Barbie $375.00 when all the others are $19.95?!?", Ralph asked surprised. The Manager replies, "Well, Divorced Barbie comes with Ken's car, Ken's House, Ken's boat, Ken's dog, Ken's cat and Ken's furniture."

"I guess I didn't get my birthday wish." "How do you know?" "You're still here!"

Doctor, Doctor, my little brother thinks he's a computer.Well bring him in so I can cure him.I can't, I need to use him to finish my homework.

Why were the flies playing football in saucer ?They where playing for the cup !

What do you call a 100 year old ant ?An antique !

What kind of birds do you usually find locked up ? Jail-birds !

What's the definition of a good tax accountant?Someone who has a loophole named after him.

Q: What's the difference between a mosquito and a blonde?A: When you slap a mosquito, it will stop sucking.

A tourist is sightseeing in a European city. She comes upon the tomb of Beethoven, and begins reading the commerative plaque, only to be distracted by a low scratching noise, as if something was rubbing against a piece of paper.She collars a passing native and asks what the scratching sound is.The local person replies, "Oh, that is Beethoven. He's decomposing."