Car And Train Jokes And Funny Stories

What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad? One trains the mind, the other minds the train.

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What do you get when you put a car and a pet together ?Carpet !

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A Roadway driver is driving east on Route 66 he sees a truck driving west and the CB crackles to life . "Hey Roadway driver whos the two biggest poofs in America?" comes from the CB.The Roadway driver replies . "I don't know" .The other trucker says " You and your brother ".Well the Roadway driver gets all annoyed but the other driver tells him "Its just a joke - tell it to the next truck you see."Well the Roadway driver drives for about an hour an finally sees another truck .he gets on the CB and says " Hey other truck do you know who the two biggest poofs in the world are?"The other trucker says " I don't know who?"The roadway driver replies " Me and my brother"

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What song does a car radio play?A cartoon (car, tune).

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Why is an old car like a baby playing?Because it goes with a rattle.

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Policeman: Are you going to a fire?Motorist: No, I'm trying to prevent one. That's what my boss said would happen if I were late again.

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What is the best thing to take when you're run over?The number of the car that hit you.

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What is an autobiography? The life story of an automobile.

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How did the woman feel when she got run over by a car? Tired.

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Who drives away all of his customers?A taxicab driver.

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