Bird Jokes And Funny Stories

What happened when the owl lost his voice ? He didn't give a hoot !

What did the parrot say on Independence Day?Polly wants a firecracker!

What do you get if your budgie flies into the blender ? Shredded Tweet !

Why did the chicken cross the playground ?To get to the other slide

Why do seagulls fly over the sea? Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls (bagels, get it?).

Is chicken soup good for your health ?Not if you're the chicken !

Why did the chicken cross the basketball court ?He heard the referee calling fowls

What happened when the chicken ate cement ?She laid a sidewalk !

David received a parrot for his birthday. This parrot was fully grown with a bad attitude and terrible vocabulary. Every other word was an expletive. Those that weren't expletives were, to say the least, rude. David tried hard to change the bird's attitude. He was constantly saying polite words and playing soft music, he did anything he could think of. Nothing worked. When he yelled at the bird, the bird got worse. If he shook the bird, the bird got madder and ruder. Finally in a moment of desperation, David put the parrot in the freezer. For a few moments he heard the bird squawking, kicking and screaming and then suddenly, there was quiet. David was frightened that he might have actually hurt the bird and quickly opened the freezer door. The parrot calmly stepped out onto David's extended arm and said: "I'm sorry that I might have offended you with my language and actions, so I ask for your forgiven ess. I will try to correct my behavior." David was astounded at the bird's change in attitude and was about to ask what had changed him when the parrot continued: "May I ask what the chicken did?"

What profession did the parrot get into when it swallowed the clock? Politics