College Jokes And Funny Stories

Professor: I forgot to take my umbrella this morning. Wife: When did you first miss it, dear? Professor: When I reached up to close it after the rain had stopped.

Arvil was coming out of the Texas University student building when he was stopped by two coeds. "Would you like to become a Jehovah's Witness?" asked one of the girls. "No, I really couldn't. I didn't see the accident."

What do they call a bunch of Mississippi football players standing in a circle holding hands? A dope ring.

Soderling, the star college halfback, was taking a math exam. The coach desperately needed him to play in the Syracuse game on Saturday, so the professor agreed to give him an oral exam. "All right," said the prof. "How many degrees are there in a circle?" "Uh, depends," said the boy. "How big is that there circle?"

A son is calling his mom from college, and telling her that he had just got his degree. The mother says: That's great honey! What kind of degree? And the son, almost squealing with excitement says: The best one ever, a Celsius degree!

Did you hear about the Penn State professor who went around in a revolving door for six hours because he couldn't remember whether he was going in or coming out?

Q: How many graduate students does it take to change a light bulb? A: Only one, but it may take him/her more than five years to do it.

Why don't Purdue athletes eat pickles? They can't get their heads in the jar.

How do you measure a Villanova graduate's I.Q.?With a tire gauge.

A college friend was going to meet a young lady he new."An old flame? I asked.He winked and said, "More like an unlit match."