Military Joke #7862
An Army Ranger was on holiday in the depths of Louisiana, where he tried to buy some Alligator shoes. However, he was not prepared to pay the high prices. After failing to haggle the vendor down to a reasonable price level, he ended up shouting "I don't give two hoots for your shoes, man, I'll go and kill my own!"The shopkeeper replied, "By all means. Just watch out for the two Marines who are doing the same."So the Ranger went out into the Bayou, and after a while saw two men with spears, standing still in the water. "They must be the two Marines," he thought. Just at that point he noticed an alligator moving in the water towards one of them. The Marine stood completely passive, even as the gator came ever closer. Just as the beast was about to swallow him, the Marine struck home with his spear and wrestled the gator up onto the beach, where several already lay. Together the two Marines threw \r nthe gator onto its back, whereupon one exclaimed "Damn! This one doesn't have any shoes either!"
NEW AND UPDATED JOKES
The Krispy Kreme Doughnut Recipe...
Isang lola ang pumunta sa...
Does your mum like shopping...
What falls, but never needs...
Ano ang puno na di...
Ano ang sinabi ng isda...
Gi treat ni misis iyang...
Q: What did the blonde...
Q: How can you help...
Q: What's a blondes idea...
Q: What did the elephant...
Teacher: Why do we put...
Q: What do you call...
Q: What is the bees...
Q: How are Boris Becker...
Q: What is the difference...
A rapist, a gangster and...
Q: What do you say...
May tama ka! Basta smartness...
Waiter: These are the best...
Q: IS IT SEXUAL HARASMENT...
1. Q: "Kung ang light...
In a job interview the...
Juan: Pre, gabi-gabi nalang akong...
"Imo ko’ng gipasakitan unya karon...
ANAK: mommy, nakita ko si...
Sa office... Caller: Hello, good...
Sabi mo mukha m0 parang...
Press <F1> or <F2>. Take...
English: "Do not do unto...
ANAK : Nay, Nay! Naa...
Q: How do you tell...
Teacher: What's 2 and 2...
Pupil 1: Bay, nakahimo kag...
Pasyente: Dok, ngano magsakit man...
si JOHNNY taga BOHOL nibalhin...
(Mag-uyab nanuroy sa mall) BF:...
Pari: Unsa’y ngan sa baby?...
TEACHER:How many liters does a...
TEACHER: give me a tag...
Ngano ang mga ginikanan lisod...
Driver: Palihug lang beh, katong...
Q: unsay bisaya sa "we...
Ang lain-lain motto. AIR FORCE:...
Anak: Ma, busog nako, dili...
Anak: Tay, di ko katulog,...
Inahan: Daghana og lung-ag, apila...
Pedro: Iuli ko nalang ning...
Usahay kung maghilak ka, way...
Anak: Pa, mangharos ko karon...
PARROT mi singgit sa tulo...
Customer: Miss, papalita ko ug...
Pedro: Juan, ari ta agi...
Nanay: Anak, tawagi imong tatay...
Kustomir: Day, mainom ning tubig...
Mahibaw-an nimo imong sakit pina-agi...
ERAP @ GRADE 1 Sa...
Lola in Manila. Security: excuse...
Tay: Nak...kabantay mi nga...ni dako...
In a singing contest. 1st...
Empleyado: Boss, namatay diay atong...
Kulas: Bay Tasyo, matod sa...
Tatay: Dong, sak-a ang mangga...
Bisaya in Manila. BISAYA: Pabili...
(Mga bisdaks in Manila) BISAYA...
(Court hearing) ATTY: Asa ka...
Akala ko ba bakasyon na?...
Calculator ka ba? Kasi solved...
Waiting shed kba? kasi handa...
Philippines ka ba? kasi it's...
Pimple ka ba? Kasi pag...
TAXI ka ba? kasi habang...
Ilaw ka ba? kasi you...
Race track ka ba? kasi...
Aanhin pa ang PAA mo?...
Ang lampa mo naman! Tatawid...
Sana naging issue na lang...
Pwede ba kitang AWAYIN? para...
Thesis ka ba? Kasi handa...
Badtrip! Ano bang problema ng...
Alam mo, para kang ampalaya?...
Apoy ka ba? kasi I...
Sana antok na lang ako,...
PIZZA ka ba? CRUST kasi...
Alam mo ba na dati...
Kung nagugutom ako at kelangan...
GOOGLE ka ba? kasi nasa'yo...
Kili kili ka ba? kinikilig...
Si Mr. BEAN ka ba...
Hanggang KINSENAS na lang kita...
Safeguard ka ba? Bakit? Germs...
Nung sinabi ko sa sarili...
Minamalat na naman ang puso...
Totoo bang habang may buhay...
Ang galing mo palang bumato...
Para kang YOSI? Kasi ang...
Sikreto ka ba? Kasi hindi...
Sana tanong na lang ako...
Miss may kanin ka ba?...
"Didja hear the news?" asked...