Accountant Joke #2693
A man walking along a country road comes across a farmer droving a huge mob of sheep. He stops and chats for a while and then says, "Tell you what, I'll bet you $100 against one of your sheep that I can tell you the exact number in that flock."The farmer thinks for a moment, it is a big mob and he can't see how anyone could guess correctly so he says, "OK. You're on.""Nine hundred and thirty two," says the man.The farmer takes off his hat and scratches his head. "I don't know how you did it but that's exactly right. A bet's a bet. Take any sheep."The man picks up an animal and is about to walk off when the farmer says, "Hang on. Bet you double or nothing that I can guess your occupation."The man thinks, "How would he know, he's never met me before" and says "Righto. You're on".The farmer says, "You're an auditor with a Big Four firm."The man whistles . "How the heck did you know that?""Well," says the farmer, "put my dog down and I'll tell you."
NEW AND UPDATED JOKES
Isang lola ang pumunta sa...
The Krispy Kreme Doughnut Recipe...
Does your mum like shopping...
What falls, but never needs...
Ano ang puno na di...
Ano ang sinabi ng isda...
Gi treat ni misis iyang...
Q: What did the blonde...
Q: How can you help...
Q: What's a blondes idea...
Q: What did the elephant...
Teacher: Why do we put...
Q: What do you call...
Q: What is the bees...
Q: How are Boris Becker...
Q: What is the difference...
A rapist, a gangster and...
Q: What do you say...
May tama ka! Basta smartness...
Waiter: These are the best...
Q: IS IT SEXUAL HARASMENT...
1. Q: "Kung ang light...
In a job interview the...
Juan: Pre, gabi-gabi nalang akong...
"Imo ko’ng gipasakitan unya karon...
ANAK: mommy, nakita ko si...
Sa office... Caller: Hello, good...
Sabi mo mukha m0 parang...
Press <F1> or <F2>. Take...
English: "Do not do unto...
ANAK : Nay, Nay! Naa...
Q: How do you tell...
Teacher: What's 2 and 2...
Pupil 1: Bay, nakahimo kag...
Pasyente: Dok, ngano magsakit man...
si JOHNNY taga BOHOL nibalhin...
(Mag-uyab nanuroy sa mall) BF:...
Pari: Unsa’y ngan sa baby?...
TEACHER:How many liters does a...
TEACHER: give me a tag...
Ngano ang mga ginikanan lisod...
Driver: Palihug lang beh, katong...
Q: unsay bisaya sa "we...
Ang lain-lain motto. AIR FORCE:...
Anak: Ma, busog nako, dili...
Anak: Tay, di ko katulog,...
Inahan: Daghana og lung-ag, apila...
Pedro: Iuli ko nalang ning...
Usahay kung maghilak ka, way...
Anak: Pa, mangharos ko karon...
PARROT mi singgit sa tulo...
Customer: Miss, papalita ko ug...
Pedro: Juan, ari ta agi...
Nanay: Anak, tawagi imong tatay...
Kustomir: Day, mainom ning tubig...
Mahibaw-an nimo imong sakit pina-agi...
ERAP @ GRADE 1 Sa...
Lola in Manila. Security: excuse...
Tay: Nak...kabantay mi nga...ni dako...
In a singing contest. 1st...
Empleyado: Boss, namatay diay atong...
Kulas: Bay Tasyo, matod sa...
Tatay: Dong, sak-a ang mangga...
Bisaya in Manila. BISAYA: Pabili...
(Mga bisdaks in Manila) BISAYA...
(Court hearing) ATTY: Asa ka...
Akala ko ba bakasyon na?...
Calculator ka ba? Kasi solved...
Waiting shed kba? kasi handa...
Philippines ka ba? kasi it's...
Pimple ka ba? Kasi pag...
TAXI ka ba? kasi habang...
Ilaw ka ba? kasi you...
Race track ka ba? kasi...
Aanhin pa ang PAA mo?...
Ang lampa mo naman! Tatawid...
Sana naging issue na lang...
Pwede ba kitang AWAYIN? para...
Thesis ka ba? Kasi handa...
Badtrip! Ano bang problema ng...
Alam mo, para kang ampalaya?...
Apoy ka ba? kasi I...
Sana antok na lang ako,...
PIZZA ka ba? CRUST kasi...
Alam mo ba na dati...
Kung nagugutom ako at kelangan...
GOOGLE ka ba? kasi nasa'yo...
Kili kili ka ba? kinikilig...
Si Mr. BEAN ka ba...
Hanggang KINSENAS na lang kita...
Safeguard ka ba? Bakit? Germs...
Nung sinabi ko sa sarili...
Minamalat na naman ang puso...
Totoo bang habang may buhay...
Ang galing mo palang bumato...
Para kang YOSI? Kasi ang...
Sikreto ka ba? Kasi hindi...
Sana tanong na lang ako...
Miss may kanin ka ba?...
"Didja hear the news?" asked...