Waiter Jokes And Funny Stories

Customer: Waiter, I found a hair in my turtle soup.Waiter: How about that! The turtle and the hare finally got together.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

CUSTOMER: Can you make a pig cooler? WAITER: Sure, spray him with a hose.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Diner: What's wrong with these eggs I ordered?Waiter: Don't ask me. I only laid the table.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Waiter (serving soup): It looks like rain today.Patron: Yes it does, but it smells like soup.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Waiter: Why are you taking so long to order?Diner: I can't decide whether I want heartburn or nausea.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Waiter, what's this fly doing in my soup?Um, looks to me to be backstroke, sir

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Waiter, there's a dead fly in my soup!Yes sir, it's the hot water that kills them.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Customer: Why doesn't this restaurant have any specials?Waiter: Because nothing about this food is special.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Customer: I thought the meals here were supposed to be like mother used to make.Waiter: They are. She couldn't cook either.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

Customer: That crust on the apple pie was too tough.Waiter: That wasn't the crust, that was the pie plate.

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/
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