Space Jokes And Funny Stories

What did the alien say when his flying saucer landed in a stud farm? Take me to your breeder !

Why didn't the astronauts stay on the moon? Because it was a full moon and there was no room.

Teacher: What do you think astronauts wear to keep warm?Girl: Apollo neck jumpers ?

What do you get if you cross an alien and a hot drink ?Gravi-tea !

What do astronauts put on their toast? Space Jam.

Why don't astronauts keep their jobs very long? Because as soon as they start they get fired.

Why did the boy become an astronaut? Because he was told he was no earthly good.

Two aliens landed their ship on a golf course and watched a young man golfing. First he hit it into the high grass, mumbling and cursing he retrieved his ball. Then he hit it into the sand bunker shouting curse words he retrieved the ball. Next he hit a perfect hole in one, then the first alien said to the second, "Uh-oh cover your ears he's going to be really mad now"!

Which astronaut wears the biggest helmet?The one with the biggest head.

Why don't astronauts get hungry after being blasted into space? Because they've just had a big launch.