Blind Joke #3383

One day at a busy...

One day at a busy airport, the passengers on a commercial airliner are seated waiting for the pilot to show up so they can get under way.The pilot and copilot finally appear in the rear of the plane and begin walking up to the cockpit through the center aisle. Both appear to be blind; the pilot is using a white cane, bumping into passengers right and left as he stumbles down the aisle. The copilot is using a guide dog. Both have their eyes covered with sunglasses.At first, the passengers do not react thinking that it must be some sort of practical joke. After a few minutes though, the engines start revving, and the airplane begins moving down the runway.The passengers look at each other with some uneasiness. They start whispering among themselves and look desperately to the stewardesses for reassurance.Yet, the plane starts accelerating rapidly, and people begin panicking. Some passengers are praying, and as the plane gets closer and closer to the end of the runway, the voices are becoming more and more hysterical.When the plane has less than twenty feet of runway left, there is a sudden change in the pitch of the shouts as everyone screams at once. At the very last moment, the plane lifts off and is airborne.Up in the cockpit, the copilot breathes a sigh of relief and tells the pilot: "You know, one of these days the passengers aren't going to scream, and we aren't going to know when to take off!"

credit: https://www.fortypoundhead.com/

NEW AND UPDATED JOKES

Isang lola ang pumunta sa...

The Krispy Kreme Doughnut Recipe...

Does your mum like shopping...

What falls, but never needs...

Ano ang puno na di...

Ano ang sinabi ng isda...

Gi treat ni misis iyang...

Q: What did the blonde...

Q: How can you help...

Q: What's a blondes idea...

Q: What did the elephant...

Teacher: Why do we put...

Q: What do you call...

Q: What is the bees...

Q: How are Boris Becker...

Q: What is the difference...

A rapist, a gangster and...

Q: What do you say...

May tama ka! Basta smartness...

Waiter: These are the best...

Q: IS IT SEXUAL HARASMENT...

1. Q: "Kung ang light...

In a job interview the...

Juan: Pre, gabi-gabi nalang akong...

"Imo ko’ng gipasakitan unya karon...

ANAK: mommy, nakita ko si...

Sa office... Caller: Hello, good...

Sabi mo mukha m0 parang...

Press <F1> or <F2>. Take...

English: "Do not do unto...

ANAK : Nay, Nay! Naa...

Q: How do you tell...

Teacher: What's 2 and 2...

Pupil 1: Bay, nakahimo kag...

Pasyente: Dok, ngano magsakit man...

si JOHNNY taga BOHOL nibalhin...

(Mag-uyab nanuroy sa mall) BF:...

Pari: Unsa’y ngan sa baby?...

TEACHER:How many liters does a...

TEACHER: give me a tag...

Ngano ang mga ginikanan lisod...

Driver: Palihug lang beh, katong...

Q: unsay bisaya sa "we...

Ang lain-lain motto. AIR FORCE:...

Anak: Ma, busog nako, dili...

Anak: Tay, di ko katulog,...

Inahan: Daghana og lung-ag, apila...

Pedro: Iuli ko nalang ning...

Usahay kung maghilak ka, way...

Anak: Pa, mangharos ko karon...

PARROT mi singgit sa tulo...

Customer: Miss, papalita ko ug...

Pedro: Juan, ari ta agi...

Nanay: Anak, tawagi imong tatay...

Kustomir: Day, mainom ning tubig...

Mahibaw-an nimo imong sakit pina-agi...

ERAP @ GRADE 1 Sa...

Lola in Manila. Security: excuse...

Tay: Nak...kabantay mi nga...ni dako...

In a singing contest. 1st...

Empleyado: Boss, namatay diay atong...

Kulas: Bay Tasyo, matod sa...

Tatay: Dong, sak-a ang mangga...

Bisaya in Manila. BISAYA: Pabili...

(Mga bisdaks in Manila) BISAYA...

(Court hearing) ATTY: Asa ka...

Akala ko ba bakasyon na?...

Calculator ka ba? Kasi solved...

Waiting shed kba? kasi handa...

Philippines ka ba? kasi it's...

Pimple ka ba? Kasi pag...

TAXI ka ba? kasi habang...

Ilaw ka ba? kasi you...

Race track ka ba? kasi...

Aanhin pa ang PAA mo?...

Ang lampa mo naman! Tatawid...

Sana naging issue na lang...

Pwede ba kitang AWAYIN? para...

Thesis ka ba? Kasi handa...

Badtrip! Ano bang problema ng...

Alam mo, para kang ampalaya?...

Apoy ka ba? kasi I...

Sana antok na lang ako,...

PIZZA ka ba? CRUST kasi...

Alam mo ba na dati...

Kung nagugutom ako at kelangan...

GOOGLE ka ba? kasi nasa'yo...

Kili kili ka ba? kinikilig...

Si Mr. BEAN ka ba...

Hanggang KINSENAS na lang kita...

Safeguard ka ba? Bakit? Germs...

Nung sinabi ko sa sarili...

Minamalat na naman ang puso...

Totoo bang habang may buhay...

Ang galing mo palang bumato...

Para kang YOSI? Kasi ang...

Sikreto ka ba? Kasi hindi...

Sana tanong na lang ako...

Miss may kanin ka ba?...

"Didja hear the news?" asked...