Monster Jokes And Funny Stories

Why did the monster dye her hair yellow?To see if blondes have more fun.

On her annual visit to another planet, an old lady turns to the cabin steward and says. "I hope this spaceship doesn't travel faster than sound. "Why?" replies the cabin steward. "Because my friend and I want to talk, that's why."

How did the monster cure his sore throat? He spent all day gargoyling.

Dr Frankenstein: Igor, have you seen my latest invention? It's a new pill consisting of 50 per cent glue and 50 per cent aspirin. Igor: But what's it for? Dr Frankenstein: For monsters with splitting headaches.

What's the difference between a dim monster and a birthday candle?The candle is a thousand times brighter!

What happened to Ray when he met the man-eating monster? He became an ex-Ray.

HWhy did the monster lie on his back? To trip up low-flying aircraft.

What do you call a huge, ugly, slobbering, furry monster with cotton wool in his ears? Anything you like ? he can't hear you.

What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?-A wash and wear wolf

What's pink and gray and wrinkly and old and belongs to Grandpa monster?- Grandma monster