Firefighter Jokes And Funny Stories
The Fire brigade phones George Graham in the early hours of Sunday morning."Mr Graham sir, White Hart Lane is on fire!""The cups man! Save the cups!" cries George."Uh, the fire hasn't spread to the canteen yet, sir."
Q.What do you get when you cross a Fire Chief two Lotus Notes Gurus ? A. FireWeb .... of course!
A fire chief died and went to heaven. When he got there he saw a long line waiting to get in to the pearly gates.He told himself, "I'm a fire chief, I'm not going to wait in line." He went to the angels guarding the gates and said, "Let me in. I'm a fire chief." The angels replied, "You'll haveto wait in line like everyone else, sir."While waiting at the back of the line he saw a sedan pull up with red lights and a man got out wearing a whitehelmet that said "CHIEF". The angels popped to attention and let the chief enter heaven. The waiting fire chiefwas pissed and went to talk to the angels.He asked, "Why did you let that fire chief go through and not me?" To which the angels replied, "You have it allwrong, sir. That's God, he just thinks he's a Fire Chief."
What did the fireman's wife get for Christmas ?A ladder in her stocking !
After the fire-truck arrived at a burning building in a small Spanish town, the firemen observed a man dressed in a matador's costume prancing around on the roof. Four of the firemen held a safety-net and urged him to escape from the burning building by jumping into the net. He refused and loudly proclaimed, "I'm Fearless Jose the bullfighter who fears nothing, not even fire."The firemen begged and pleaded but to no avail. Jose kept prancing around while repeating the same phrase over and over until the firemen got really sick and tired of hearing it. Finally, when the flames began to scorch his butt, Jose announced he had changed his mind, was ready to jump and then leaped off the rooftop. As his body hurtled toward the safety-net, the four firemen shouted, "Ole!" and quickly moved it aside.
Q: What word begins with the letter "F" and ends in "UCK"?A: FIRETRUCK.
A firefighter died and went to hell where he finds a wall of clocks.After seeing all these clocks on a wall, with his friends names under them, he asked the devil, what the clocks mean?"That's easy, each time one of your friends mess up on earth, their clock speeds up one hour." says the devil."I don't see the Chiefs clock anywhere?" the fireman says.The devil replied, "Oh him, we have his down in the basement, we're using it for a fan."
Q: What is the first thing off the truck at a trailer fire? A: Lawn chair.
There was a huge fire at a big city soda factory. The city company was losing ground and the owner wasfrantic. He told the fire department that he needed a secret formula in the safe that was in the center of theblaze, and he would give 10,000 dollars to the department that got the formula. An hour later no ground wasgained and a mutual aid call was put out. When 12 departments couldn't subdue the blaze the owner saw thishe raised the reward to 100,000 dollars. Suddenly a small town department drove their truck right into the fireand emerged 10 minutes later with the formula. When asked what they would do with the money one said,"Get them damn brakes fixed we figure."
Q: Why don't Deputy Fire Marshals look out the window in the morning? A: So they have something to do in the afternoon.