Face Jokes And Funny Stories

A woman just back from Arizona was telling her friends about the trip. "When my husband first saw the Grand Canyon, his face dropped a mile," she said."Why, was he disappointed with the view?""No, he fell over the edge."

Teacher: What a glum face, what would you say if I came to school with a face like yours ?Pupil: I'd be too polite to mention it !

Wife to Husband: I'll have you know I've got the face of a teenager! Husband to Wife: Then you should give it back, you're wearing it out.

My teacher's got a pretty face if you can read between the lines.

Once there was a church that had a bell that no one could ring. One day, a boy came and asked the priest if he could try. So the boy went up into the tower and ran straight into the bell, face-first. The bell tolled loud and clear. The shocked priest gave him the job. But one Sunday, he ran straight toward the bell with his face and missed and fell off the tower and died. "Congregation," the priest said before the assembled masses. "Does anybody know this boy's name? Because I don't know him, but his face rings a bell."

Q.What do me and a mirror have in common? A.When we see your face we both crack up!

Why did the pig have ink all over his face? Because it came out of the pen.

You can read his mind in his face. Yes, it's usually a complete blank.

First Witch: I like your toad. He always has such a nice expression on his face. Second Witch: It's because he's a hoptimist.

Did you hear about the witch who was so ugly that when a tear rolls down her cheek it takes one look at her face and rolls straight up again?