Clinton Jokes And Funny Stories

Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child? Because dad can't keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.

Q: What is the best thing that ever came out of Arkansas?A: Highway 55.

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year?A: Because they can't afford any more pork.

Q: What's Clinton's favorite baseball team?A: The Dodgers.

Last summer, the President and Mrs. Clinton were vacationing in their home state of Arkansas. On a venture one day, they stopped at a service station to fill up the car with gas. It seemed that the owner of the station was once Hillary's high school love. They exchanged hellos, and went on their way. As they were driving on to their destination, Bill put his arm around Hillary and said, "Well, honey, if you had stayed with him, you would be the wife of a service station owner today." She smirked and replied, "No, if I had stayed with him, he would be President of the United States."

Q: Why are people in Arkansas having peanut butter and jelly for Thanksgiving this year?A: Because they're sending their turkey to the White House!

Q: Why did Bill and Hillary send Chelsea to a private school?A: If they sent her to a public school, the secret service would be out-gunned!

Q: What does Bill Clinton have in common with former great Presidents?A: Absolutely nothing.

Q: When will there be a woman in the White House?A: When Hillary leaves town.

Q: What do you get when you cross a crooked lawyer with a crooked politician?A: Chelsea.