Blonde Jokes And Funny Stories
A car was driving down the street when all of a sudden it started swerving. The car was going back and forth till someone with a cell phone called the police. A police officer pulled the car over. A blonde rolls down the window and says, " Officer, I'm so glad you are here. I saw a tree in the road, then I saw another. So I had to swerve to keep from hitting it!" The officer looks at her, then says, "Ma'am, that's your air freshener."
A blonde walks down the street and sees a banana peel a hundred yards ahead, and she sighs. "Here we go again."
Q.) What happens when a Blonde eats a mosquito? A.) She has more brain cells in her stomach than her head.
A blonde got lost in her car in a snow storm. She remembered what her dad had once told her. "If you ever get stuck in a snow storm, wait for a snow plow and follow it." Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it. She followed the plow for about forty-five minutes. Finally the driver of the snow plow got out and asked her what she was doing. She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got stuck in the snow, to follow a plow. The driver nodded and said, "Well, I'm done with the Wal-Mart lot, now you can follow me over to K-Mart..."
Q: Why did the mirror have 6 holes in it? A: A blonde tried to shoot herself!
A blonde is walking down the street with her blouse open, exposing one of her breasts.A nearby policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware that I could cite you for indecent exposure?""Why, officer?" asks the blonde."Because your blouse is open and your breast is exposed.""Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the bus!"
Teller: Why did the blonde move to L.A.?Blonde: I don't know. Why?Teller: It was easier to spell.Blonde: Easier than what?
Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH?A: A blonde going through a flashing red light.
Q: What is a blonde doing when she holds her hands tightly over her ears?A: She's trying to hold on to a thought.
Why did the blonde tip-toe past the medicine cabinet? She didn't want to wake the sleeping tablets!