Apple Jokes And Funny Stories

What do you get if you cross a jogger with an apple pie ?Puff pastry !

What lives in apples and is an avid reader? A bookworm !

How do you get the most apples at Halloween? Take a snorkel.

If it took six pigs two hours to eat the apples in the orchard, how many hours would it take three pigs? None, because the six pigs have already eaten them all.

Fred came rushing in to his Dad. "Dad!" he puffed, "is it true that an apple a day keeps the doctor away?" "That's what they say," said his Dad. "Well, give me an apple quick ? I've just broken the doctor's window!"

Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard?Someone told him he should get an apple Mac

If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps everyone away.

What kind of apple has a short temper?A crab apple.

What is the left side of an apple?The part that you don't eat.

What's the difference between a worm and an apple ?Have you ever tried worm pie ?!